[Atsushi reads the note, and wondering if this is about their fight, he'll dutifully meet Vanitas where it's indicated on the map. He offers a small wave, peering around before glancing at Vanitas.]
[ He pulls out a notebook and pats the spot next to him. Also putting the tea by him so it looks like they are doing something. ]
On the show, this is usually when we find common ground gossiping about the others. Like who we both should betray or maybe how we should team up to vote someone off.
[ Writing in the note book. ]
Mics might be able to pick up convo. Cameras can't see us. Have to cancel the fight plan.
[Atsushi falls silent at that. It's hard to keep up a conversation, with this topic. He knows a lot of people did. It was part of the game, and... Atsushi had enjoyed it, honestly. Maybe a bit too much for it to be casual.
He's surprised by the hair ruffle, and it's enough to get him to lift his head, bicolored eyes carrying a question. Why?
But Vanitas' last words... they pose a question to Atsushi, as well. One he still hesitated to answer.
Did he like Dazai? He thinks he knows what might be the answer, but admitting it...
There's a long moment where his pen just hovers over the paper, before.]
[ his rep is going to go in the toilet after this and he hates it. he doesn't want people to see the jagged bits that Aqua had worked on sanding down here and there. He didn't want people to see the weaknesses he had or that maybe he doesn't hate everyone after all. This world has been good, even if he was still a tool to be thrown away.
And here he was trying to pat someone interested in taking someone he wants.
Dropping his hand away as he reads the words again.
It's a difficult question. He wants to say yes. He wants to say it's the first time he's wanted to take this kind of risk or felt this way. He wants to be selfish so badly...
but can he even make that call? ]
I don't know I want to say yes but I don't own him.
[Atsushi feels guilt twist his stomach as that hand falls away. It feels like a rejection, like he's disappointed someone he actually appreciates, even if he's snide to Vanitas at times.
But it makes sense, doesn't it? Vanitas cares about Dazai. He didn't want to take him away from Vanitas, but.... what he wanted was....
What he wanted was to hold Dazai like he so clearly needed when there was nothing else he could do to help. What he wanted was to keep him company.
It's a long moment before he eventually scratches out a reply.]
I care about him.
And he told me the best way to help him is to keep him company. I can't stop seeing him.
If he wants me to stop, I'll stop.
But I like you, too. I don't want to hurt you.
[He's clearly nervous about what he's writing, but... he cared. And Dazai wanted him around, in whatever manner they haven't discussed yet. He didn't know how to vocalize what it meant to him, to be wanted.]
I can't just turn off how I feel about him either, you know. Or anything we might have between us.
But I'll talk to him about it, and ask what he wants.
[It's not the answer Vanitas wants, probably. It's not the answers Atsushi's entirely comfortable giving either, but... There's more sides to this than just him and Vanitas.]
I don't want to hurt you. But I need to talk to Dazai.
[ he'll flinch at the anything we might have between. because that's not what he got from Dazai ]
Too late.
[ because that does hurt. a different kind than the usual. and with that, he's up on his feet immediately and heading off. he has to move quickly before the unversed appears. ]
[Atsushi flinches, looking hurt and guilty. It wasn't the answer Vanitas wanted, that much was clear. but Dazai hadn't told him about any of this, and...
...
He watches Vanitas leave, dropping his head onto his knees once he's gone.]
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darkremnants) wrote2019-06-23 04:51 pm
Everything Happens So Much
Hey. You wanted to talk to me?
no subject
On the show, this is usually when we find common ground gossiping about the others. Like who we both should betray or maybe how we should team up to vote someone off.
[ Writing in the note book. ]
Mics might be able to pick up convo.
Cameras can't see us.
Have to cancel the fight plan.
no subject
[He'll settle next to Vanitas, reading what he writes in the notebook before pulling out his own pen--he's prepared, it seems.]
Got it.
I need to look at that map.
Why?
[Also he's going to just reach over and snag one of those drinks. If Vanitas brought them for looks he shouldn't protest Atsushi having one, right--]
no subject
[ Good boy. He'll write under those words. ]
Promised Dazai.
He would have to execute whomever survived.
[ He shared with Dazai plans. ]
no subject
[He'll open the bottle while vanitas writes his response, taking a sip. There's a furrow to his brows as he does, though.
He'll write his own response after.]
Even if no one died?
I didn't get a chance to mention it to him.
no subject
[ There's a pause, as if he's trying to figure out what to write or rather how much to write.
If he uses tiger smell he may be able to pick up what exactly vanitas is hesitating about. he still smells like dazai. ]
Even if no one died.
I told him yesterday.
no subject
[That pause is definitely suspicion. Before using the tiger's sense of smell though, he'll give Vanitas a long, searching look.
After that, though... When he takes a sniff, it's a familiar scent he smells.]
I thought violence wouldn't be punished?
You were with Dazai yesterday?
Doing what?
no subject
[ Vanitas might have opinions on erasing your sins.
there's another pause. It would be easier to share if this was Saki or Aqua. Because Vanitas is pretty guarded as it is. ]
Either that's a lie or he
[ freezing as he realizes what he's going to write. ]
no subject
[Atsushi has Opinions too.]
Or the rules have changed and he won't have a choice.
He cares too much to let us risk it.
[He sniffs the air again, a little deeper this time. Was he--]
....You and Dazai were close?
no subject
controlling his expressions as he continues on their convo. ]
It's also the easy way out.
[ looking over at him at the sniffing though. ]
He is soft.
[ they figured that out from him getting in trouble. that's an easier thing. but the close part... ]
Does it matter?
no subject
He is. I worry about him.
[It's a soft noise of agreement, but he's a bit distracted. Vanitas smells like... he was really close to Dazai.]
You smell like him.
[Ok, he knows that sounds weird. He's flushing a bit.
The most awkward thing is that Atsushi knows he smells like Dazai, too.]
no subject
[ thankfully Vanitas doesn't have a sensitive nose and isn't going to smell atsushi cause that's weird.
he does raise a brow ]
Do you smell everyone like this or am I special?
[ it's Atsushi. there's no way he'd use this to hurt him or get at him since it's linked to Dazai. ]
we had a date last night.
no subject
It's a very distinctive scent.
[More like 'he likes the way Dazai smells'. Sorry Vanitas, he's a furry, just accept it.
But at the word 'Date', Atsushi can't hide any of his reaction. He looks surprised, a little torn and--
He ducks his head quickly to hide his expression.
Should he tell him? Would it upset Vanitas? But--]
We spent some time together yesterday evening, too.
no subject
[ So that's something, right?
He'll look over at Kitten. He has a crush on Dazai. He knows that from Inaba saying it and teasing about it.
Vanitas isn't sure how to feel about that yet. All he knows is what Dazai has said. ]
I'm sure a lot of people did. It was part of that game.
[ He lifts his hand up for a moment... hesitates before giving Atsushi a hair ruffle.
Then he'll write again. ]
I'm pursuing him seriously.
no subject
He's surprised by the hair ruffle, and it's enough to get him to lift his head, bicolored eyes carrying a question. Why?
But Vanitas' last words... they pose a question to Atsushi, as well. One he still hesitated to answer.
Did he like Dazai? He thinks he knows what might be the answer, but admitting it...
There's a long moment where his pen just hovers over the paper, before.]
...Should I stop?
no subject
And here he was trying to pat someone interested in taking someone he wants.
Dropping his hand away as he reads the words again.
It's a difficult question. He wants to say yes. He wants to say it's the first time he's wanted to take this kind of risk or felt this way. He wants to be selfish so badly...
but can he even make that call? ]
I don't know
I want to say yes but I don't own him.
no subject
But it makes sense, doesn't it? Vanitas cares about Dazai. He didn't want to take him away from Vanitas, but.... what he wanted was....
What he wanted was to hold Dazai like he so clearly needed when there was nothing else he could do to help. What he wanted was to keep him company.
It's a long moment before he eventually scratches out a reply.]
I care about him.
And he told me the best way to help him is to keep him company. I can't stop seeing him.
If he wants me to stop, I'll stop.
But I like you, too. I don't want to hurt you.
[He's clearly nervous about what he's writing, but... he cared. And Dazai wanted him around, in whatever manner they haven't discussed yet. He didn't know how to vocalize what it meant to him, to be wanted.]
no subject
On the other hand this is all new and he has no idea what to feel. ]
See him. He needs friends.
[ He won't tell him not to see him, but... ]
I'm dating him.
no subject
But I'll talk to him about it, and ask what he wants.
[It's not the answer Vanitas wants, probably. It's not the answers Atsushi's entirely comfortable giving either, but... There's more sides to this than just him and Vanitas.]
I don't want to hurt you. But I need to talk to Dazai.
no subject
Too late.
[ because that does hurt. a different kind than the usual. and with that, he's up on his feet immediately and heading off. he has to move quickly before the unversed appears. ]
no subject
...
He watches Vanitas leave, dropping his head onto his knees once he's gone.]